And so it was, ironically enough, a mundane and innocent threat that finally brought the leader of the notorious Keane Kult to justice.*
This is old and overlinked, but it's baseball season now and it's always good to be reminded of brilliant things, so go (re)read this statistical analysis of Charlie Brown's baseball team. Despite their sincerity, they are not very good.
Is there any situation more horrible than Crankshaft knocking at your door, angrily demanding a place to poop?
And so Dolly has already mastered the fine art of scapegoating.
This comic is hilarious because Mr. Dithers would like to shoot and kill his employee, but feels constrained by a particular law that has no actual bearing on the situation.
Ha ha! The existence of acronyms and emoticons is definitely a good reason to wish for the wanton destruction of all human life! Good point, Wiley!
Continuing the thread of existential angst from a couple days ago, here we see what Hi and Lois would have looked like if Albert Camus had decided to go to work for Mort Walker Inc. instead of dying in a car accident.
These last few 9 Chickweed Lane comics would probably be more emotionally resonant without the bizarre hand-fucking.
Dolly is vastly overestimating her idiot brother's intelligence here. She ought to know better. Given his embarrassingly limited mental capacity, there's simply no way Jeffy could formulate a plot as complex as putting a caterpillar on his sister's shoulder.
Because what better way to celebrate the resurrection of Christ than by raping and pillaging the countryside?
Whenever Garfield begins to feel the weight of his monotonous existence, on the other hand, he just partakes of a little sadism, and all is right with the world.
On its face, today's Hi and Lois might seem absurd. But, in fact, it's quite astute. All of the problems facing the country today really can be traced back to the public library, which was the first in a long line of progressive movements designed to lead the United States of America into socialist bondage. Yes, I know it's hard to remember now, but there really was once a time when people were free in this country, back before Obama and civil rights and medicare and social security and feminism and the abolition of slavery and libraries.
Yes, Dolly is attempting to control PJ's nose now. She is pathological.
When I first saw this cartoon, I was all set to mock Hank Ketcham Inc. for making a pop culture reference 25 years too late. But then I realized that someone out there has, for reasons nobody seems to understand, been in the process of remaking Footloose, and someday it might even get released. And so then I was worried that Hank Ketcham Inc. might actually be more on top of things than I am. But then I realized that Hank Ketcham Inc. has probably still never heard of the original Footloose and was instead almost certainly referring to actual, honest to God church shoes without any intention of conjuring up images of Kevin Bacon dancing at all. Which is probably the funniest thing of all.
Speaking of cruel, eternal hells, oh look, it's Crock.
This comic is hilarious because Beetle is trapped by the rituals of his life, destined to forever spend day after day hiding in trashcans and other unseemly nooks, praying he could stop but ultimately remaining unable to do so, as though he were in some sort of cruel, eternal hell.
And so Momma is a serial killer.
And so the mechanic in Shoe shares his misery with any passerby that will hear him out. "There's no way out of Treetops," he says. "It's a dying, dead-end town. A purgatory from which there is no escape. Having long lost our ability to fly from over-reliance on the dread technology, we just drive from rotting tree to rotting tree, hoping maybe, just maybe today will be the day a branch will break, and we'll go plummeting down to the sweet, sweet hell that at long last awaits us."
This Get Fuzzy has excellent comic timing, and "Did you just eat the threat banana?" is just a funny line.
What are the odds this plugger can even wait long enough to microwave this ravioli? Sure, his intentions are good, but judging by his facial expression, just getting it out of the can and into a bowl is clearly challenge enough.
One of the challenges I have in writing this blog is that I know virtually nothing about the fundamentals of drawing. This is why I mostly stick to things like story and dialog and only mention the art when I see an especially egregious display of hackery.
This comic is hilarious because Hi is planning to engage in an act of physical affection three months from now that might lead to intercourse. Lois, meanwhile, has already given herself an out.
One of the oddly appealing* things about Mark Trail is that it has refused to change with the times. Everything about it is proudly old-fashioned, from the black-and-white morality to the art to the endless stream of exclamation points! It's the kind of comic you can imagine pluggers enjoying without the least bit of irony.
This cartoon is hilarious because Billy is impatient for his New World Order to really get off the ground.
It's the tower-building that really makes this comic.
And so this is what the most tolerable Keane child is going to grow up to be: Earl Pickles.
This comic is hilarious because Herb has to pee.*
