Saturday, March 20, 2010

Family Circus: Mommy! The mud wouldn't let go of my shoes!

And so Jeffy has apparently formed himself a mudhole in the yard and stuck only his feet into it. Why? Because he's Jeffy and that's just the way he rolls.

Sally Forth: IS he single?

This comic is hilarious because Sally's depressed sister wants to fuck her asshole boss.

No, really.

Mother Goose and Grimm: I call it ... "The Bark."

Yes, The Scream is the only work of art anyone in the comics section has ever heard of.

Hi and Lois: Relax, we still have plenty of time.

Considering how horribly mangled Lois's feet are, hiding them just out of panel is probably the way to go.

Also, women are always late for stuff! Ha ha!

Momma: So how come he took the easy way out?!

And so Momma's husband apparently killed himself and now her son is considering doing the same.

No, this is not surprising.

Friday, March 19, 2010

Monty: No! No! Oh how she used to love sucking the futon!

I've expressed my love for this robot-on-vacuum love story before, and now it's also given us "Oh how she used to love sucking the futon," which is just one of those nonsensical phrases that's a lot of fun to repeat without context to crowds of horrified non-Monty-reading people.

Family Circus: We got matching dresses ... 'cept Mommy's came with more curves and things.

This cartoon is hilarious because Thel has a huge rack, which, judging by Bill's self-satisfied smirk, more than makes up for her questionable fashion sense.

Thursday, March 18, 2010

Cathy: I remove everything in the refrigerator that's "expired."

And so Cathy apparently hordes, and possibly ingests, actively rotting foodstuffs.

She can't help it! She's a woman! She has food-craving hormones!

9 Chickweed Lane: I just beat the shit out of Colonel Horrocks.

I still have a ton of problems with this interminable 9 Chickweed Lane story, but I'm always a fan of hiding objectionable words behind chairs. In general, I just like the idea that word bubbles are part of the material world of the comics section.

Family Circus: Sorry, Mommy, I didn't dream about you last night...

Of course, when Jeffy dreams about you, it generally involves your internal organs being cut out and eaten.

Wednesday, March 17, 2010

Moderately Confused: You can't judge a book by its battery life.

Oh my God, technology is ruining all our cliches!

I think this more or less explains the comics section's general fear of new things, actually.

Cul de Sac: My home is crawling with philistines.

When you see the "Trope" label down at the bottom of a post here, it usually means I'm annoyed with a comic for being hackish. But that's not the case with this Cul de Sac. This is a really simple joke, and one everybody's seen a million times before, and yet it works. In general, the difference between a well executed trope and a poorly executed trope is the quality of the characters and dialog that surround it.

Funky Winkerbean: Even so...

" might well get brutally gang-raped and murdered. This is the Winkerverse,* after all."

*Or is it the Funkyverse?

Family Circus: My marshmellow feels a little dry. Do we happen to have any warm chocolate milk?

This cartoon is hilarious because Dolly would like some warm chocolate milk to go with her marshmallow.

This will most likely make Thel very angry.

Dennis the Menace: St. Patrick drove the snakes out of Ireland. We need a saint who could drive the kid out of our house.

This cartoon is hilarious because Mr. Wilson would like somebody to kidnap and drown his neighbor's child. He would dub such a person a saint.

Tuesday, March 16, 2010

Monday, March 15, 2010

Ziggy: RELAX ... the Somali pirates aren't anywhere NEAR here!

This Ziggy is pretty funny when it's situated directly next to the above installment of The Phantom, as it is here and in my local paper.

Otherwise, of course, not so much.

Family Circus: See! Mommy's birthday's in March and Daddy's is in October, so Mommy's OLDER!

I'm not really sure what insane method of timekeeping Dolly's trying to trick Jeffy into following, but it seems cleverly designed to humiliate both her idiot brother and her constantly angry mother. Jeffy does, however, seem to be either confused or skeptical, so she might want to try something a bit less convoluted.

F Minus: World's Most Public Toilet

It's the facial expressions that make this comic work so well. Without it, we'd just have the absurdity of the world's most public toilet. With it, we have the absurdity of the world's most public toilet getting in the way of an actual human relationship.

Born Loser: The buzzards have returned!

Mother-in-law ... misogyny ... ha ha ha.

Better Half: I think I need an oil change.

And so the fat guy with the big nose is apparently an insane person who believes himself to be an automobile.


Sunday, March 14, 2010

Family Circus: *

Once again, The Family Circus is quite a bit better in the larger Sunday strips than the single-panel dailies. Today's comic is an effective study of Thel's character.