Momma: I'm sorry your husband took his own life, Sadie.

You know, comics about characters joking around about how they wish they were dead because their marriages are so miserable were getting kind of stale for me. Fortunately, today's Momma really takes things to the next level of hilarity by having a character literally kill himself and then having his hateful wife point out that he did it because their marriage was miserable.

The only thing that could have made it more humorous is if we had actually seen his lifeless body hanging from the rafters or something. But I'm holding out hope that we'll eventually get that scene when Mort Walker Inc. finally decides to write General Halftrack out of Beetle Bailey.

Momma: Bread, milk, eggs and poison.

And so Momma is a serial killer.

No, this is not surprising.

Momma: Does it stop?

Ha ha! 'Cause, Toyota.

Momma: Because in those days women were discouraged from seeking careers.

What are the odds this started out as an abortion joke?

I'm going ten to one.

Momma: So how come he took the easy way out?!

And so Momma's husband apparently killed himself and now her son is considering doing the same.

No, this is not surprising.

Momma: You know, old age is good for the economy.

This comic is hilarious because these morally and financially bankrupt young people are taking advantage of their senile, yet equally unlikable, mother.

Momma: We'll be right back, Momma!!!

This comic is hilarious and sad because Momma's children won't even have group sex with her in her dreams.

Momma: Please your son with something nice from our store!

This comic would be hilarious enough if it were just about a loving mother buying her son some quality time with a prostitute. But because of all the effort Mell Lazarus has put into fleshing out these characters, we know that this comic is even more hilarious than that, as it is actually about a loving mother buying some time with a prostitute so that she can engage in an incestuous ménage à trois with her son, who has up until now been reluctant to accept her many sexual advances.

And that is why characterization is so important.

Momma: Francis, I'm hoping you'll spend the evening with me.

In which Momma's subtext becomes about as explicit as is possible in the comics section.

Momma: How very nice!!

Most people read Momma and just see a terrible comic strip. But I read Momma and see a terrible comic strip about a woman who desperately wishes she could have sex with her grown male offspring.

Momma: See? I begged you to learn long division.

I sometimes think that I should have gone into a professionally useful program like engineering and finished my schooling in a timely manner. But then I wouldn't be mostly unemployed and have all this free time to write this swell blog. So you're welcome, I guess.

Momma: Mrs. Hobbs, would you entrust your heart to me?

Um...

Momma: I'd love a newspaper job!

It's really hard to imagine how this installment of Momma could possibly be any further out of step with the current economic situation facing both newspapers and the world at large.

Momma: Someday you might need an organ.

Personally, I married my wife for her liver.

Her healthy, healthy liver.