Saturday, February 6, 2010

Sally Forth: Maybe he'll get fired. Then work for a fast-food place. Then get rehired. Then you get promoted and get your own staff.

Given that it quickly briefs readers on a continuing storyline while at the same time telling a fairly amusing joke, this is a pretty effective use of a flashback.

Strange Brew: So ... good fences make good neighbors, huh?

This cartoon is either hilarious because the cartoonist is cleverly illustrating the point of Mending Wall or hilarious because the cartoonist is illustrating that he has completely missed the point of Mending Wall.

Mark Trail: I'm Joe Parker and this is my brother Moe!

The main lesson I've taken from this past year of Mark Trail is that if you know a young man named Moe who's prone to shaggy haircuts, you should probably punch him in the face immediately, as he's bound to be a villain.

Hagar the Horrible: You're new to this business, aren't you?

Here we see the return of my least favorite trope to the comics section.

Family Circus: Nobody broke it. It's a jigsaw puzzle.

This cartoon is hilarious because Jeffy's so stupid he doesn't know what a puzzle is.

No, really.

Friday, February 5, 2010

Get Fuzzy: Morning, Rob.

Why do I love Get Fuzzy? Because of the sandwich in Satchel's thought balloon.

Lola: You gonna eat that pickle.

This is pretty clearly a clever attempt on the part Harry to finally get Lola over her reluctance to participate in his perverse food play fantasy.

Hi and Lois: Would you look at me differently if I took my glasses off?

This comic is hilarious because if you wear glasses no boy will ever look at you, you impressionable young girl you.

Family Circus: We had an eye test today! I got a 20 and a 20!

This cartoon is hilarious because Dolly is pleased that she has good vision.*

*Probably because she's been reading the comics section.

Dennis the Menace: It's s'posed to be dog whistle, but I can't get Ruff to blow it.

Today's cartoon suggests that Dennis is not so much a menace as he is a fucking idiot.

Thursday, February 4, 2010

Family Circus: Sorry, Daddy, I'm all out of smiles for today.

Looks like someone's been reading the funny pages.

Funky Winkerbean: Honk! Honk!

If tomorrow's Funky Winkerbean doesn't contain a graphic, road rage inspired murder, I'm going to be extremely disappointed.

Dennis the Menace: Someday he'll have kids of his own ... then I'll get my revenge.

This comic is hilarious because Mr. Wilson is plotting the murder of Dennis' unborn children.

Wednesday, February 3, 2010

Monty: I hope you saved the receipt on that.

Old jokes, well executed.

Mark Trail: It's going to be a tough decision, Mark, about what to do!

This comic is hilarious because someone actually gets paid to write dialog like this.

In other news, I've found this storyline to be thus far completely incomprehensible. Apparently, I would have felt the same way in 1979.*

*Via friend of the blog Bill Peschel.

Luann: Toni! What're you doing here?

This comic is hilarious because Brad and Toni are going to have sex on the floor of the fire station lounge.

Family Circus: ...why'd you write it on the back of the picture I drew for my teacher?

As should be clear by now, Dolly has no actual human emotions, so this whole "Why do you hate me, Mommy?" thing is obviously a clever ruse designed to lay a guilt trip on her mother and wrest yet more control over the dynamics of their relationship.

Tuesday, February 2, 2010

Cow and Boy, Cul de Sac and My Cage: Tolstoy was a twinkie man.

I'm sort of cheating on the whole Best Comic of the Day thing by listing three comics here, but they're all terrific. I appreciate the reversed gender roles in today's My Cage--generally the trope involves women trying to lose weight before their weddings. And "mongkeys" are always funny. But my heart is with the Cow and Boy below, which reads, as it often does, as though it were written just for me.

One Big Happy: Tell them i just shoveled two feet of partly cloudy from our front walk!

Ha ha! It's almost like weather forecasts are estimated likelihoods or something!

Hi and Lois: RIP! KLUNK

This comic is hilarious because bowling balls are heavy.

Family Circus: Mommy, some of PJ's drawing didn't fit on the paper.

Jeffy: still a douche.

Monday, February 1, 2010

Look, Bill Watterson gave somebody an interview.

Go read it, as it will probably never happen again.

But because we're disagreeable on this blog, I would like to offer a bit of pushback on this:

It's always better to leave the party early. If I had rolled along with the strip's popularity and repeated myself for another five, 10 or 20 years, the people now "grieving" for "Calvin and Hobbes" would be wishing me dead and cursing newspapers for running tedious, ancient strips like mine instead of acquiring fresher, livelier talent. And I'd be agreeing with them.

I think some of the reason "Calvin and Hobbes" still finds an audience today is because I chose not to run the wheels off it.

I've never regretted stopping when I did.

Obviously, Watterson probably made the right choice for himself. But the idea that it's "always better to the leave the party early" is one that I've never really been able to get fully behind. For example, Peanuts in the 90s was clearly not as good as Peanuts in the 60s. But I wouldn't actually want to give up those latter-day Peanuts. And I don't complain at all about newspapers rerunning all those old Peanuts. Because Peanuts is awesome.

The comics people curse newspapers for running are the bad ones, many of which you can find running down the sidebar of this fine blog. Just as Peanuts never became tedious or dull or otherwise bad, there's no reason to believe Calvin and Hobbes would have either. It may have become not as good, and if Watterson felt that was likely, than it's entirely his right to walk away from it. But as a fan, I would gladly have taken another fifteen years of not quite as good Calvin and Hobbes. And speaking as someone who occasionally tries his hand at various forms of art, if I every create something of worth, I plan on running it into the ground.

(Via friend of the blog Talcott Starr)

Hi and Lois: You need lower cholesterol, right, Dad?

This is actually a pretty clever commentary on the way advertising works. Well played, Mort Walker Inc.

Pluggers: When a plugger goes on a bus tour and forgets his meds, at least 10 other passengers can loan him some of theirs.

What is Hell? A tour bus full of obese, malodorous, drug-addled, ignorant, egocentric, senile, selfish, sexist, smug, possibly singing people-sized animals with bad breath? Yea, that is Hell.

Family Circus: I'm not sure what I should do today--listen to my iPod or fight with Jeffy.

It really does annoy me when humorous slice-of-life cartoons depict characters saying things that no living human being would ever actually say.

Drabble: And what don't you understand about it, exactly?

Spousal abuse! Ha! It never gets old!

Sunday, January 31, 2010

Beetle Bailey: I'm a MESS!

This comic is hilarious because Sarge is a misogynistic, self-loathing drunk.

Rudy Park: All the best, Nancy G.

While my general feelings on Rudy Park should be pretty well established by now, I have absolutely nothing bad to say about this particular, really quite touching comic.

Family Circus: Can we come in now? We're COLD!

Considering that the real, honest-to-God, actual punchline here appears to be "Ha ha! These kids are pussies," I think we can chalk it up as further evidence that Keane Inc. despises its child characters.

Grand Avenue: Snowmen are obese and they smoke.

Grand Avenue needs to stop echoing The Family Circus right fucking now.