Better Half: There's a Twitter in my alphabet cereal.

This cartoon is hilarious because Glasbergen* clearly has no idea what "a Twitter" is.

*No, I will not look up his full name, as that would require more effort than he put in to the making of this cartoon.**


**Which makes no goddamn sense, by the way.***

***Also, this.

Drabble: First you'll need to get some of this black stuff to put on your cheeks.

Please note that eye black is quite literally the central subject of this comic strip. Note also that the youngster is wearing freshly applied eye black in the second and third panels. Now observe said youngster's face in the fourth panel.

There are four panels here. Maintaining some semblance of artistic continuity should not be that difficult. And yet.

Mark Trail: Wow, Mark, take a look at that!

Here, for perhaps the first time, we see a character in the Elrodverse expressing natural human sexual urges. Mark is either very confused or about to punch Ranger Buzz in the face.

Cathy: Sooner or later, we all regret the fortune we've spent on bubble bath and cologne.

This comic is hilarious because Cathy is sexually frustrated.

Family Circus: 'Cause it's my birthday!

At this point, I think it's safe to say that Jeffy's just kind of a pervert.

And it sort of horrifies me that I'm about to start listing appearances of Jeffy's naked body under the Tropes label.

Beetle Bailey: If he says again that this lake isn't polluted, don't believe him.

And so Sarge is apparently some sort of god. This is pretty surprising, so one would hope he has mercy on his disbelieving underlings.

Shoe: What do you think of the Brussels sprouts?

This joke is almost as funny as the time I saw it in The Family Circus.

Mark Trail: We have a portage up ahead. Then we will stop by and visit with our friend Ben Harris...

"Our friend Ben Harris really is a swell fellow! You have not forgotten that our friend Ben Harris is our friend, have you Ranger Buzz? (You are also my friend, Ranger Buzz!)"

Family Circus: PANTS ON THE GROUND!

This comic is hilarious because Jeffy is a miserable little person who everybody hates, with the sole exception of his grandmother, with whom he shares a kindred soul.

Pearls Before Swine: Well now gosh dern dadburn it!!

If Pastis wanted to repeat this comic with a different annoying character getting an arrow through the chest every week, I'd probably be OK with that.