Family Circus: Follow me, you guys!

As it turned out, neither Dolly nor PJ followed him, and Jeffy was forced to practice his "oooohs" and "aaaahs" alone.

Family Circus: I hope my dream tonight don't turn out to be a rerun.

And so it turns out that Jeffy's mind is so deficient that it is literally incapable of producing more than five dreams, which it just replays over and over again in a randomized loop. Given the lack of wish fulfillment in Jeffy's sleep, it's no wonder that he kills. He just wants to feel something, even if it's just the warm spattering of blood on his cheek.

My Cage: Well, thanks for coming to visit, neighbor.

Ooh, ooh, don't forget the gremlins.

Herb & Jamaal: !

Oh, Herb and Jamaal, why do you tease us with intimations of Herb's violent death yet never dare follow through?

Family Circus: Butterflies sure have a hard time deciding where to go.

In Dolly's New World Order, there will be no capital punishment. Those convicted of violent crimes will instead be turned into butterflies.

Family Circus: Mommy! Will you tell PJ to stand still so I can play with him!

It's always good to see Jeffy's sadism on full display. Of course, in the first draft, he was holding knives.

Pearls Before Swine: I, Rat, have figured out that the key to happiness is to lower your expectations. So I have created the "Expectation Crusher."

I desperately need this machine.

Family Circus: Wow! Your new chair's comfortable and the perfect size! Right, Daddy?

It's really the "Right, Daddy?" that makes Billy's clearly intentional torture of his father all the more delicious.

You deserve it, Bill. You deserve it all.

Family Circus: Our lawn is the best! We've got more little yellow flowers than anyone else.

On second thought, maybe Dolly will stage a Yellow Revolution. Let a thousand flowers bloom and all that.

Luann: The moon was full and the front door was wide open.

Yep, definitely top 20. Almost certainly top 5, in fact. Here's a list of disturbing shit going on in this Luann storyline:

1. Luann has seen Gunther naked.
2. Luann keeps making flirtatious remarks about it.
3. Luann keeps making flirtatious facial expressions behind Gunther's back.
4. Gunther's legs are kind of beautiful.
5. Gunther is wearing a worm costume...
6. which signifies his emotional state.
   
7. Gunther's worm costume makes it appear as though he has a giant fucking cock.
8. Luann used the phrase, "The moon was full and the front door was wide open." I'm not entirely sure what it means, but I never, ever want to see it again.