Pearls Before Swine: Does he want something you have?

Okay. See, this is why Pearls Before Swine is a better comic strip than Cathy is. In Cathy, Irving never gets kidnapped by a zebra.

As should be clear, I rescind my complaint of yesterday's Pearls, seeing as it was necessary set-up for today's, which does take the old "spouse is away" trope in a (darkly) funny and unexpected direction. I will never doubt you again, Pastis, you crazy bastard you.