Rhymes with Orange: I knew them when they were a garage string quartet.

I have nothing to say about this Rhymes with Orange, but it made me laugh, so here it is.

Family Circus: And help me keep my mind on my prayers...

It's actually pretty nice of Dolly to try to obfuscate Jeffy's mumbles of "Kill! Kill! Kill!" Unfortunately for her, the God of The Family Circus is omniscient and cruel, and Jeffy's already tagged for an eternity of conscious torment in Hell. Not because he's a serial killer or anything. Just because he's stupid.

Pluggers: Pluggers know that it's not always a good idea to go paperless.

Oh, you like your fancy new iPad, do you? Well, as this Pluggers points out, good luck wiping your ass with it.

Funky Winkerbean: I think I prefer the more somber cover.

This is Funky Winkerbean. Of course she prefers the more somber cover.

Family Circus: Corn tastes best when it's on these rollers.

Of course, the main reason Jeffy likes corn on the cob so much is because it reminds him of tearing the flesh off of human bones.

Crankshaft: Pop goes the weasel...

And so Crankshaft is a conspiracy theorist.

This is the least surprising news ever.

Family Circus: Mommy, PJ wandered out of his nap again.

In the New World Order, people will sleep when Dolly wants them to sleep. There may be pills involved. And a firm curfew enforced by a harsh police state.

Non Sequitur: Meet the blogger

Really, Wiley? A mother's basement joke? Really?

No one hates new(ish) media like Wiley hates new(ish) media.

Family Circus: I found this in the garbage.

Billy is about to fashion a wildly inventive toy for a needy child from an object the Keane family no longer needs or wants.

Thel is already beginning to get very angry about it.

Edge City: That miserable creep!

This comic is hilarious because because Mama Edge thought her children were about to get abducted by a pedophile.

No, really.

Beetle Bailey: Maybe you don't know what sexual harassment IS, sir.

Lately, Beetle Bailey has been running through a set of old cartoons in celebration of either its 60th anniversary or getting picked for a stamp. I'm not quite sure which. But regardless of why it's happening, I always appreciate seeing older incarnations of a comic strip and observing how it has changed over the years.

This particular comic is from 1986, which is around the time that Mort Walker Inc. started taking complaints that its strip was a bit on the sexist side seriously. The strip dramatizes the transition nicely by coupling didactic, feminist dialog with amazing, gravity-defying tits.

Get Fuzzy: All hail the box monkey!

Oh, Get Fuzzy, I think I missed you most of all.

Family Circus: This water doesn't taste as good as the ocean.

On the day that Jeffy Keane finally faces the electric chair for all the horrible things that he has done, his last meal will most likely consist of play dough and salt water.

Drabble: Norm, as you prepare to leave home to go live at college, you may be having second thoughts.

To be honest, I'm not really sure what to make of this Drabble storyline. I have to assume that the cartoonist will find some labored method of ensuring a return to the status quo by the end of the week, as Drabble's a simple gag strip that doesn't weigh itself down under anything even resembling serialization. At the same time, there's no rule saying the return to the status quo has to come any time soon, or even at all. So while I kind of doubt we're witnessing a Funky Winkerbean situation--and, indeed, I highly doubt the introduction of serialization would actually make Drabble a better comic--it's not as though there's no precedent for that kind of thing.

And so, for once, I'm actually looking forward to reading future editions of Drabble.

Baldo: I'm back!

And so no one likes Gracie.

This is not surprising.

Family Circus: Well, we're almost home ... vacation's all over.

Ha ha! Life's so miserable when you grow up! That's why adults are angry all the time! It's adorable!

Blondie: Hey, Dag, the vending machines are empty again.

The first two panels in this Blondie, as in many Sunday strips, are throw-away panels so newspapers can excise them to save space while still maintaining the cohesion of the comic. My newspaper, however, decided to leave the first panel in while taking the second panel out. The result being that I thought the comic was about Dagwood being sad about empty vending machines (despite his earlier facade of nonchalance) when it was in fact about him trying to decide whether he wanted pizza or corned beef for dinner. I think.

As it turns out, it's not funny either way.

Beetle Bailey: Originally published in 1969.

Just in case you were wondering whether Beetle Bailey's rambling Sunday strips or Sarge's struggles with his sexuality were anything new, the answer is, er, not so much.